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Tesla D. Recipient

Illinois Lvaders

Depression is starting to wear me down lately. Im tired of people looking at me like i have five heads; and they have no idea what the F*ck im saying. I feel like im screaming in which nobody can hear and im here just existing and nobody can see me. My mom refusers to broaden her horizons and meet in the middle for any stipulation that arises. ( i dont know my dad ). She throws me out often and i pay her rent for staying there. I have lost so many friends cause im not the person i was, and that also upsets me. I feel so alone all the time, and i its all i have felt since i Was born, unwanted. I called my mom to tell her that i was switching hospitals and thati felt like there was no growth there i was literally just stuck, waiting on people that i thought were my advocates. My mom responded with i dont have time for your shit anymore. Blah. I need more lvad people in my life, a support, a niche, something has got to give here before i literally, lose myself in the midst of my worth. I have been couch hopping for 7 months and actively seeking a room for rent or a roomate that wants to get a house or any slice of sunshine that i can call my own, since everything i always manage to earn in life gets taken away. Im not asking for a pioty party i just wanna feel like im not doing this for nothing, im seen, and that im heard. If yoiu wanna be friends go ahead and shoot me an email! And a we will go from there. Thankful for you guys. Email:  

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Stan C.

I am just now seeing this as I don't login daily and wait for the discussion email letting me know there are other responses.

I'm going to send you an email and will identify myself so you know it is not from a crank email person.  I don't really want to discuss everything that seems to be going on in you life here as it sounds quite personal and don't think you will want to discuss it in an open forum.

Before my email arrives, I would like to recommend you consider seeking counciling if for nothing else but to give you someone to speak to.  You might consider professional help, your pastor, or even a close family member.

Look forward to speaking with you.

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Irving Mark H.

It's sad that you are having so many issues.  I just got my lvad Sept 17 2021.  Since I am an older male, no one has even noticed my equipment. And no one has even once said anything about all my cables.  I am San Diego CA.  I wish you well.  Good Luck

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In reply to by Irving Mark H.

Chuck S.

I have had my LVAD since May 10,2019 I have had many questions about my equipment including being asked if I was carry a bomb ( twice ) or if I was carry weapons . Never go to the airport without a letter from your team on official stationery explaining what it is used for .

tjank you

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Sassy123 B.

My husband got his lvad October 2017 passed away May 2022 but don't get me wrong people have lived a lot longer

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Dayle W.

I’ve been informed that my heart is recovering and they may cut the cord and leave the hardware in me.  Has anyone had this experience?

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In reply to by Dayle W.

Sassy123 B.

When my husband got his lvad his heart was only working at 15% then after a few months they said his heart was working at 65% which is good that is so a year later they said his heart was failing completely and he passed away on May 4th his heart just quit

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In reply to by Dayle W.

Irving Mark H.

This is very interesting to me.  I would like to find all information on the heart recovery that you are experiencing. You see, last year, I really felt just fine, but according to the echo, my ejection factor dropped to 19% and my doctor said I had 2 months to live.  It never made sense to me because, I had been feeling well, exercising daily, and did not have any restrictions.  But, all the medical people agreed that the LVAD was my only choice to live.  Now I have heard that some people's hearts have had some recovery, as you apparently have had.  Now after 10 months with the LVAD, I finally feel as good as I did when the doctors said I had just 2 months to live.  Again any information you can share with me about your hearts recovery would be appreciated, and good luck.

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Sassy123 B.

They also wanted to cut his pump off I wouldn't let him they kept telling me he was going to die and I wasn't going to let him die in the hospital I had him about four more weeks

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Misty C.

Hi Tesla, 

I also live in Illinois and have a hard family life my mom passed away I never knew my father and 2 siblings have passed and one I don't talk to so that leaves no immediate family but remember family isn't always blood family is what you make. I have had the same feeling as you many times I'm 36 and got my Lvad on April 27th 2021 so I've only had it just over a year. I have a great support system in a friend who was willing to take me in when I was down in 2017 and I've been with her ever since. She helped me through my surgery because I had no one else in my corner. I'd love to talk with you more. 

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Bob S.

I use Wildkin two compartment lunch bags to carry my equipment and have a bunch of them that match my outfits. No one even realizes I am carrying medical equipment. Check them out. It may make you feel less conspicuous.  Sue S.

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I'm walking September 17th at the DuPage County Fairgrounds.
Please join me or donate!